I’m quite interested in mindfulness and the rewiring of the brain / mind to engender better habits and thought patterns.
On the positive I’m quite strong minded and determined.
On the negative I’m a multi tasker and I’ve got shit to do!
So… Relaxation… The quietening of the mind and meditation is a challenge.
I decided to turn to a bit of hypnotherapy, so I got an app and plugged my buds into my lugs to listen for the required 20 minutes or so to the soothing inspiration that is going to turn my life around.
‘Try and listen to each session 3 or 4 times a day in peace and quiet’ was the suggestion.
Who the f&#@ has that luxury I thought.
Any hooo.
Unfortunately, as soon as there is a suggestion of me getting into a prone position to ‘relax’ there is a mad scramble of little animals to sit on top of me. This raucous takes a few minutes and the two winners settle their fat little bodies on my fat little body. The others settle next to me and snore like chainsaws within three seconds.
I then announce to my lovely man that I’m going to meditate for a bit.
Almost immediately he reads out an interesting article, plays a video… Or… My personal favorite.. Asks me if he has a CVS number because he’s clicked on a link and they are asking for it.
I persevere…
The soothing voice tells me I am going to ascend to a safe place. That I am at the top of a spiral staircase, and as I make my way down.. I will sink further and further into a state of serenity and be open to positive suggestions.
What the actual…?
Do I have to get there via death stairs? Why would anyone pick a spiral staircase for the love of…
Needless to say, I have not yet achieved a state of serenity.
I am spending most days in a state of white knuckled sweat.
OMG Rosie – I completely concur. How hilarious…..Those who actually manage to get to the place of serenity, they so glibly speak of yet seems to elude us, must surely be living in total isolation, far, far from the madding crowd!!!
I think they are all lying 😂 nobody is actually there.