Historical – My Lovely Man – Life in Africa

Things have largely calmed down with regards to having to be hosed down and disinfected every time you go anywhere. Thank goodness. We still get disinfected and have to wear a mask into shops here in Zimbabwe and Mozambique. Us cynics suspect that the governments are NOT likely to lift restrictions totally because there is still AID to be begged for and subsequently exploited.

Certainly in many parts of Africa the washing facilities that were insisted on were less than desirable and likely to leave you with more disease than you started with. It was also quite common, it seemed, that they carefully tracked down the village leper to disinfect you.

Anyway, here is a post from March 2020 to remind us.

We trundled back to Beira from Harare yesterday. Spent an unpleasant few hours at the Consulate in Mutare, patiently waiting for them to do a 5 minute job of issuing a work visa, applied for a month ago. Why did it take so long? To flex their power I presume after I stupidly explained we had animals in the car outside and needed to get to Beira that day. The mind boggles. Smiled and kept my 😎. Arrived at the Moz border and was waved down frantically having driven past the Corona Virus check point unwittingly. Stopped and was instructed by the muffled voice through a face mask that we must have our temperature taken and wash our hands in the chlorine treated water. So there you go, Moz will be safe now.

Watched my lovely man dunk his hands in the dirty bucket of water.

Darling, I said, what are you doing ffs?

He said I must wash my hands..

That’s the catchment bucket sweetheart, use the tap above it.

Never mind he says, we’ve complied, let’s go.

Might let him touch me by Christmas.

Daily Life – it’s tense this blogging

It’s tense this stuff.

I can’t figure out how anyone can like, follow or subscribe.

My brother tells me he is working and will look into it tomorrow. Tomorrow! For pity’s sake.

My lovely man wants me to look at the apparently enormous moon. There’s no time! I last observed him commandeering Mandova to admire the moon with him.

The cat tried to sit on my lap and I had to scream in his face ‘I’m blogging!’

Then my lovely man said ‘You have to come and look darling, its not going to be this big again for a year’

And honestly, who can turn that down?

Daily Life – you can’t make it up

Make up. I’m not good at it. Every time I think about doing something about improving my skills, I conclude I couldn’t really be bovvvered.

On a good day I look half respectable, on a bad day, I could play a starring role in ‘That 70’s Show’.

And make up brushes… I have a set. It didn’t really come with instructions and there are many, many brushes. I don’t know what they are supposed to be used for, I couldn’t really be bovvered see.

I was bemoaning the fact to a friend that I used the wrong brush incorrectly and now it has dark powder on it vs the light powder it should only have on it (don’t want to get too technical here).

I explained that this was a problem because now I was looking like I had two black eyes.

And then! I said with pride. I washed it. And now it’s fine.

Radical she said, how long did it take you to conclude that option, or use another of the many brushes you seem to have no use for?

I know right, I said, I am considered the problem solver in my organization.

Whatever they are paying you, she said, it’s probably too much.

Topical Historical – Watch it, it’s a Robot

Did you see the terrible story of the robot that was playing chess against that poor kid and the robot grabbed the little guy and broke his finger?

Wonder if the kid was winning at the time? Bet that Google guy they just fired for saying AI have real feelings is saying ‘I told you see, now it’s ended in tears’.

Might give one pause before ordering a sex robot from Amazon if these things are going to get a bit grabby don’t you think?

My Lovely Man – and his Beehive


My lovely man is interested in bees. And bats. He will speak at length about Bee Vectoring, which (I believe), involves bumble bees carrying chemicals (pesticides/fertilizer – who knows) to crops.

It is fascinating. Although I have queried with my lovely man if they have little knapsacks and if they are paid, this information has not been forthcoming.

On the bat issue…

When I enquired about what was on his bucket list he advised me that he always wanted to go to Zambia where apparently there is an enormous bat migration to view.

We are not aligned on this bucket list item.

Back to the bees.

For some time now he has indicated he wants to get a hive or two to keep at home. Bees are indeed to be nurtured, so this I encouraged.

I too love bees. Sadly, I had an unfortunate incident when I was a child. I stood on a dead bee and had a quite violent reaction to its sting. This has been my only bee sting, and it was dead! Who would have thought that could even happen. So, I am not sure I am allergic, but I am reluctant to repeat the experience.

Nevertheless, must be supportive. And we all need bees. There is a shortage I read.

So, my lovely man has done some research and then tracked down a fellow from a garden centre nearby who makes hives. My lovely man bought this fellow back to the house and together they determined where the hive should be located. In the corner of the garden.

Unfortunately, quite near where I like to sit with my wine and strawberries.

It’s going to end in tears I can see, and they are likely to be mine.

Apparently, this fellow is making the now ordered bee hive and it will be delivered hence forth.

Does it come with actual bees I enquired? Or at least a queen to attract the poor little worker males? (Wouldn’t it be ideal if the rest of the world operated like that – a big fat queen adored by her buzzing little male workers).
I don’t think so he said, the guy said that the bees will just come.

I refrained from reminding my lovely man that we did this with a bat box and not one has ‘come’

Location, location, location I suppose. Who knows.

So, we will have a hive and then, I guess, we will wait to see if they will come, or if it’s just a scam.

As it turns out, I will remain the only queen around for now.

My Lovely Man – and his spiders


Last night my lovely man leapt out of bed in the middle of the night, switched the light on and started beating the bed clothes.

The pups immediately went ballistic, adding to the chaos.

What is wrong????!!!! I screamed, most reasonably.

Spiders he announced, there are spiders in the bed, and they are biting me.

What the actual…..

Are you bitten? Do we need to tend to your bites? What the hell?

Then he switches off the light and goes to sleep. As do the pups. I lie there for the rest of the night, rigid with fear.

I like spiders and generally am not scared of them. Spiders, bees, snakes and ghekos should be nurtured really.

However, I do not really fancy a bunch of bitey spiders as bed mates.

This morning my lovely man wakes me up with coffee (bless him). He also wakes me up with coughing, snorting and nose blowing (he has had a cold FOREVER it seems).

Are you OK I asked when he had finished hacking. Do I need to look at your spider bites?

No, I think it was just a dream (we’ve been there before with snakes, I should have known).

So, this morning I’m shattered and I’m looking to trade him in really.

Topical – J&J baby powder


Did you see that J&J have crumbled to the ongoing lawsuit pressure and plan to stop selling their legacy talc-based baby powder products.

What, I hear you asking, am I going to put in my big girl panties to keep things cool and fresh?

This is where the trouble started for J&J of course. All kinds of things going horribly wrong with their apparently asbestos based stuff.

So, I googled it, and these are some of the options I can tell you for nothing.

Cornstarch and baking powder.

May create a bit of snap, crackle and pop or get things rising.

The mind, actually boggles.

I had a friend, (no names mentioned), that was quite generous with her panty talc. We could see when she came back from the loo because there was a little trail to follow.