Month: August 2022

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Daily Life – you can’t make it up

Make up. I’m not good at it. Every time I think about doing something about improving my skills, I conclude I couldn’t really be bovvvered.

On a good day I look half respectable, on a bad day, I could play a starring role in ‘That 70’s Show’.

And make up brushes… I have a set. It didn’t really come with instructions and there are many, many brushes. I don’t know what they are supposed to be used for, I couldn’t really be bovvered see.

I was bemoaning the fact to a friend that I used the wrong brush incorrectly and now it has dark powder on it vs the light powder it should only have on it (don’t want to get too technical here).

I explained that this was a problem because now I was looking like I had two black eyes.

And then! I said with pride. I washed it. And now it’s fine.

Radical she said, how long did it take you to conclude that option, or use another of the many brushes you seem to have no use for?

I know right, I said, I am considered the problem solver in my organization.

Whatever they are paying you, she said, it’s probably too much.

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Topical Historical – Watch it, it’s a Robot

Did you see the terrible story of the robot that was playing chess against that poor kid and the robot grabbed the little guy and broke his finger?

Wonder if the kid was winning at the time? Bet that Google guy they just fired for saying AI have real feelings is saying ‘I told you see, now it’s ended in tears’.

Might give one pause before ordering a sex robot from Amazon if these things are going to get a bit grabby don’t you think?

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My Lovely Man – and his Beehive


My lovely man is interested in bees. And bats. He will speak at length about Bee Vectoring, which (I believe), involves bumble bees carrying chemicals (pesticides/fertilizer – who knows) to crops.

It is fascinating. Although I have queried with my lovely man if they have little knapsacks and if they are paid, this information has not been forthcoming.

On the bat issue…

When I enquired about what was on his bucket list he advised me that he always wanted to go to Zambia where apparently there is an enormous bat migration to view.

We are not aligned on this bucket list item.

Back to the bees.

For some time now he has indicated he wants to get a hive or two to keep at home. Bees are indeed to be nurtured, so this I encouraged.

I too love bees. Sadly, I had an unfortunate incident when I was a child. I stood on a dead bee and had a quite violent reaction to its sting. This has been my only bee sting, and it was dead! Who would have thought that could even happen. So, I am not sure I am allergic, but I am reluctant to repeat the experience.

Nevertheless, must be supportive. And we all need bees. There is a shortage I read.

So, my lovely man has done some research and then tracked down a fellow from a garden centre nearby who makes hives. My lovely man bought this fellow back to the house and together they determined where the hive should be located. In the corner of the garden.

Unfortunately, quite near where I like to sit with my wine and strawberries.

It’s going to end in tears I can see, and they are likely to be mine.

Apparently, this fellow is making the now ordered bee hive and it will be delivered hence forth.

Does it come with actual bees I enquired? Or at least a queen to attract the poor little worker males? (Wouldn’t it be ideal if the rest of the world operated like that – a big fat queen adored by her buzzing little male workers).
I don’t think so he said, the guy said that the bees will just come.

I refrained from reminding my lovely man that we did this with a bat box and not one has ‘come’

Location, location, location I suppose. Who knows.

So, we will have a hive and then, I guess, we will wait to see if they will come, or if it’s just a scam.

As it turns out, I will remain the only queen around for now.

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My Lovely Man – and his spiders


Last night my lovely man leapt out of bed in the middle of the night, switched the light on and started beating the bed clothes.

The pups immediately went ballistic, adding to the chaos.

What is wrong????!!!! I screamed, most reasonably.

Spiders he announced, there are spiders in the bed, and they are biting me.

What the actual…..

Are you bitten? Do we need to tend to your bites? What the hell?

Then he switches off the light and goes to sleep. As do the pups. I lie there for the rest of the night, rigid with fear.

I like spiders and generally am not scared of them. Spiders, bees, snakes and ghekos should be nurtured really.

However, I do not really fancy a bunch of bitey spiders as bed mates.

This morning my lovely man wakes me up with coffee (bless him). He also wakes me up with coughing, snorting and nose blowing (he has had a cold FOREVER it seems).

Are you OK I asked when he had finished hacking. Do I need to look at your spider bites?

No, I think it was just a dream (we’ve been there before with snakes, I should have known).

So, this morning I’m shattered and I’m looking to trade him in really.

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Topical – J&J baby powder


Did you see that J&J have crumbled to the ongoing lawsuit pressure and plan to stop selling their legacy talc-based baby powder products.

What, I hear you asking, am I going to put in my big girl panties to keep things cool and fresh?

This is where the trouble started for J&J of course. All kinds of things going horribly wrong with their apparently asbestos based stuff.

So, I googled it, and these are some of the options I can tell you for nothing.

Cornstarch and baking powder.

May create a bit of snap, crackle and pop or get things rising.

The mind, actually boggles.

I had a friend, (no names mentioned), that was quite generous with her panty talc. We could see when she came back from the loo because there was a little trail to follow.